I wanna take HC101/HC102/HC205/HC240/HC253/HC440...But HC461 is already killing me...I have no analytical skills seriously, never had...Urgh urgh urgh...Help~
A tutorial with only 5 students and a tutor is not a myth. I was in it just now. Chinese Migration tutorial group 2 had a grand total of 5 students plus the tutor. The other people had "migrated" to tutorial group 1. The number of people in T2 had been dwindling since the beginning and I never realized it was due to "migration". Yun Shuang and Ying Han disappeared last week, and more disappeared from outside the TR77 at 2.25pm to inside the tutorial room cuz they went for the earlier one. T1 ended up super crowded, and ours, super 冷清. Next week, for the last tutorial session, we shall have a grand reunion. Hurray...
。尋找中@15:59
Crap. I forgot to ask for no onion for Subway! Eeks. I can't believe I haven't had Subway for a month.
I suddenly felt a strong urge to blog after a discussion with Shiyan after Chinese Migration lecture on 新移民. The discussion left me rather agitated, angry, sad, and plain dissatisfied.
Singapore seems so into making Singapore the country successful that it no longer mattered who is behind that success. Be it in sports [giving sportsmen who can make Singapore a champion in yet another arena], economy and business [placing expatriates at top management positions cuz they have greater intelligence, capability and network], education [employing China-Chinese teachers to teach our dear little potatoes, provided the latter can even understand, as well as bringing in foreign research talents]; the list goes on [cuz I can't come up with anymore but I'm sure more exist].
What does it mean when Singapore makes it to the top? That Singapore can do it? That Singaporeans can't? That those who can do it can be Singaporean? That Singapore has more than enough $$$, not to buy the glory, but to buy those who can help us attain glory?
Back to the same old question I shall not assume the answer to: are foreign sports talents playing for us cuz they feel that they are Singaporeans, or are they Singaporeans cuz they play for us and earn for us a rare gold for our medal tally [and an extra million dollars for their personal account]?
Take Chinese players for example. There's no doubt that they are good. But "good" is simply not enough where they come from, cuz "good" is abundant; you have to be "best". Fair enough, they come to Singapore in search of a place where they can shine and be fairly honoured for their talent. They can be the "best" here. But what happens to our "good" who could have been "best"? They can only settle for being "better" than the rest.
There's competition. We should motivate ourselves to work harder. If they can do it, so can we! So what if they have a headstart? We can do an Alonso! It's not that easy. Fine, I'm a sore loser. My Chinese isn't that great, I know. But in SC at least, I was one of the better ones, but never the best. I never compared myself with the Chinese students, and I was happy where I was. But when you are where the naturally stronger party makes up the majority, there is no longer any point in ignoring their existence and excellence. And I just can't seem to catch up. There are Singaporeans who do as well, if not better, but the proportion is still apparent. Fine! I am simply a sore loser who is dissatisfied about how I never ever managed to climb up.
I used to tell my friends how I want my Chinese to be better than my English, but not my English to be worse than my Chinese. My English isn't good, and my Chinese has always been better than my English. My Chinese isn't good enough, which might imply that my English totally sux. I end up being looked down by both the Chinese-rooted potatoes and the China Chinese, for my comparative incapability in English and Chinese respectively. The Chinese-rooted potatoes think that just cuz I'm cheena, my English totally cannot make it. Yes, I can't apply English in such a sophisticated way that you can, but I can handle basic communication in English. The China Chinese thinks that just cuz I'm Singaporean or for whatever reasons, my Chinese can never be anywhere as good as them and it is unfathomable how I can make it when they cannot. I can't understand nor use profound Chinese, but neither can the majority of the people. Be audience-centered, will you? Ok, sometimes I do over-react to such stuff, but slight implications have enough significance to me. Double discrimination [I think it's not an appropriate word, but I can't think of anything else - my English is not good] is not good. At most, the potatoes are labelled "bad Chinese", and the Chinese is stereotyped for "bad English". And that's not true. Some supposed potatoes are not that starchy after all; they just favour English over Chinese; there are also China Chinese like Meicen from my Sec 4 class who can be really good in English. 我两头不着岸，但我至少看得到两头岸。
As you can see, I am strongly influence by personal bias. No offense meant to anyone.
Then again, seriously, what happens to: The process is more important than the results? Singapore is obviously not interested in the process. Success is all that matters. Who cares who's behind the success as long as Singapore is honoured for that success? We should be sorry since Singapore is taking credit for success not entirely created by us, and be grateful to those who did it for us. Wouldn't you rather watch and support wholeheartedly as Singapore, as represented by Singaporeans, slowly climb up the ladder to success, instead of seeing the name Singapore leap to success with no idea how we did it? Did "we" even do it? Instead of giving a million dollars to foreign talents who can get the gold medal for Singapore, why not use that money to develop local talents?
Don't give the man the fish, teach him how to fish. Don't use the money to buy the fish, use the money to grow your own fish. The natural reproductive cycle of the fish goes on and on, the money can run out [although I hope it never will].
Another question I was wondering: there is some sort of superiority associated with foreign talents - is that self-imposed or imposed on them by us cuz we just feel inferior to them?
I've regained hope in MAS111. However little, it's still hope.
I shall skip my Monday tutorial.
And attend the tutorial on Tuesday.
I attended today's tutorial as make-up for missing yesterday's session, and found this tutor much more conducive than my original tutor. The latter comes to lesson with no apparent preparation, writes the solutions on the board while murmuring to himself, and sometimes teaches us the wrong stuff which we have to correct him. Today's tutor comes to lesson with well=prepared OHT [yes, old school, but effective], explains concepts well and teaches helpful stuff beyond the syllabus. He's just a little slow. Today tutorial was supposed to be on Assignment 11 and he spent 45 minutes talking about Assignment 10, bringing us briefly through Assignment 11 and leaving it to us to complete. At least he teaches well. And he's a Singaporean, meaning he has no accent and is pleasant to listen to.
However, going for Tuesday's tutorials will mean sacrificing my uber-short Tuesday. It's just for another week anyway. At least I get back a little faith in Math.
I went KBox yesterday! I must be out of my mind. Exams are in 3 weeks' time!!!
Anyway. It was an interesting combination of people. Hui Ling, Jin, Supei, and Hui Ling's friend. Quite nice people to K with. But I still want to K with 6C people! I want midnight K after exams!!!
Lousy KBox has a grand total of 3 SMYT songs. I want more SMYT!!!
COM205 impromptu speech delivery starts today, and it turned out that P.F. wasn't serious about the order being totally random. Which means I'll be speaking next week. So much for my coming week being free and easy. It is, to a certain extent, since there can be no preparation.
I was wondering what my ideal topic will be, and I realize I'll love talking about • Blogging • My Favourite Colour • My Favourite Country • Music • Math - Passion Gone Wrong
I'm still in bad mood. Looking forward to 5.30pm..
。尋找中@15:10
WTH Our Math lecturer sent an email asking us to go to some Interactivity Room at SPMS to collect our Test 1 script today morning, without specifying the time. I went there before my Korean class and had some trouble finding that place. When I finally found it, there was nobody there. Morning... Come on lah, 6am to 11am is considered morning. When exactly does your 'morning' refer to?
I'm in antisocial mood today.
I forgot what I wanted to blog about. Crap... Whatever.
。尋找中@10:26
This weekend is the last heaven before hell. [Actually it is hell already; it's just relative heaven.] There's no test next week nor any assignment to submit! There's another Math test and the Chinese Migration report due next next week though. I must survive through today and enjoy my weekend! ...Starting on my Chinese Migration report so that I won't die next weekend. There's Impresario event on Saturday, tuition on Sunday and KBox on Monday though, so I need to make good use of my time. I have really bad time management. =X
Yeah! We offstoned for Vol 15 Issue 5 Nanyuan! Especially late this time though, for Nanyuan. Everyone seemed surprised that we were still around at 11pm last night. Oops... The whole layout process this time was more difficult than the last time, but the offstone process was much smoother. Anyway, as exasperating as it can get, I like to do layout! *Brainwash brainwash brainwash* Haha, I really do! I want to get Adobe Creative Suite [if it isn't too expensive]. I can't decide between CS3 and CS4. Still waiting for a reply to my email. I want to play with Photoshop! Sadly, I have to admit that as 宣传组长, my Photoshop skills are really mediocre and certainly not up to standard. Haiz...
I realize that I am easily distracted, by myself or any external interference, when I'm doing my own work. But when I'm working for a good reason, I can be so focused and oblivious to everything else. Or at least, I want to ignore everything and just get my work done.
Jay Chou's new album is nice. =)
I want to go KBox! Singing is good for de-stressing! XD
。尋找中@09:15
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Too bad my brain doesn't have that capacity... Chinese and European histories are so interesting! I think my brain will explode if I studied them under the subject of History... I shall start from Taiwan first... Hehe... I want to take Cross-Taiwan Straits Relation! Hopefully I do well enough for Chinese Migration to gain some confidence before I take another HC4XX... I can't wait to start on my 5000-word-max report! I think I just can't wait to get this week over and gone... Grr...
。尋找中@09:09
I'm hungry. I want to eat Subway. Fine, I shall get that for lunch tomorrow. 6" cold cut trio, roasted with cheese, with everything except cucumber and capsicum, topped with Chipotle Southwest... Plus a white chocolate macadamia cookie... I'm making myself hungrier.
Why am I feeling hungry at this time and not going to sleep? Good, my eyes are starting to feel heavy. I better off the lights soon so I don't disturb my roomie.
I got back to hostel at 11pm today. No shuttle bus, raining; what the hell... South Spine is freaking at night. Oh, and Chron room's computers shut down automatically at 10.40, with a warning at 10.30. Another day tomorrow! Yeah! At least we'll leave feeling happy [hopefully] tomorrow. Jiayou!
Remind me to stay away from non-canned iced coffee. Stop me if you see me about to drink. No, stop me if you see me about to buy. Thank you in advance.
。尋找中@00:30
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
After Boggle training, I didn't go back to my room and study for the two tests that I have no time for; Shiyan and I went to our hall's Halloween movie screening. We watched "The Exorcist". Pissed, I got so damn freaking freaked out. That face, that eyes, that voice; horrid. Gosh, hope I don't get nightmares lah. I rarely get freaked out by horror shows lah. Walao I'm traumatized.
有些“不爽”是不会go away的，就像我不爽云顶。I'll never go there again.
On the other hand, I just cannot have enough of Taiwan! OMG I'm still thinking of going Taiwan...
Back to COM203 and 南苑 =) [MAS111 go to hell -.-]
My brother's in Wuhan! Random~ [That means I get full access to the PC this weekend =P]
。尋找中@20:08
Friday, October 17, 2008
I'm so glad my student improved for her EOY! I was quite worried actually, not about her ability, but about how she will perform during the exam itself. So happy for her improvement! Good job, Shi Tian! Jiayou for Sec 4! XD
Haiz! 真是无presentation一身轻啊！ It's damn shiok getting two presentations done in a day! [Not much fun preparing for them though =/] No more presentations to prepare for! Except an impromptu speech which cannot be prepared for anyway...
I'm so proud of myself for my COM205 speech! Not that it was excellent, but I personally felt that I improved quite a lot. =P Or maybe the last time was just too lousy. =X I am satisfied with my overall performance. Not so much for the content, cuz I made a stupid mistake [to be explained later]; I thought my presentation style was much better than the last time. Despite not-so-occasional-yet-not-too-frequent stuttering, I think [hope] I was loud and clear, and paused appropriately for my points to sink in. Too bad I started off rather flustered, but I did re-compose myself a little as I went on.
As for the mistake, this is what happened when you don't practise with timing. I thought my speech would be too long, but it was actually so short I finished before the first bell! Note: I wasn't on bullet-train mode and was speaking at quite an acceptable pace and pausing at times. I left out precious information which would have been very useful in making my speech more balanced and hence more persuasive. I should have done the part on misconceptions non-vegetarians have about vegetarianism, which would have affirmed and acknowledged common perception, before I moved on with my attempt to persuade them. I actually eliminated that cuz I thought I would go overtime! Crap!
What makes me proudest is my slides! I did those in less than half an hour, right before tutorial! This is shameless pride, since it indicates my lack of preparation actually. The slides nearly couldn't show, and I wasn't too reluctant to go without it. Due to some miracle, the slides appeared OK when I re-opened the file. Thank goodness, they did me no harm. Whether they helped is another story. =P
Back to MAS!!! lecture [yuckz]...
I want a new laptop case =( Mine's getting dirty; light colours and fabric so don't go together.
。尋找中@15:18
懊恼！ I never do myself justice! Damn low morale for COM205 speech later...
Korean speech sux! I wasn't that bad during practice; I wasn't that nervous when I was down there; I was damn freaking freaked out when I had to speak! Everytime also like that... I have a serious case of stage fright? Once I stand up there, I cannot make it. Start stuttering and forgetting and rambling rubbish... Crap... One more English speech to go... Hope this doesn't go as bad...
。尋找中@12:20
Thursday, October 16, 2008
안녕하세요! 제 이름은 캬휘입니다.
저는 중국 음악을 좋아합니다. 제 친구와 나는 주말에 보통 노래방에 갑니다.
저는 보라색과 은색을 좋아합니다, 하지만 저는 보통 검정을 입습니다. 저는 뚱뚱합니다, 기래서 저는 치마를 입지 않습니다.
저는 난양대학교에서 커뮤니케이션 연구를 공부합니다. 일학년입니다.
제 집이 학교에서 멉니다, 그래서 대학 기숙사에 있습니다. 저는 주말에 집에 갑니다, 그리고 저는 보통 집에서 밥을 먹습니다. 제 대학 기숙사 방이 넓습니다. 스얀 씨도 같이 대학 기숙사에 있습니다.
스얀 씨도 커뮤니케이션 연구를 공부합니다. 스얀 씨와 나는 같이 학교에 갑니다, 그리고 유리는 보통 셔틀 버스를 타고 갑니다.
유리는 요즈음 아침에 방에서 비스킷을 먹습니다, 하지만 저녁을 식당에서 먹습니다.
스얀 씨와 나는 저녁에 방에서 인터넷을 하고 공부합니다. 저는 한국어를 공부합니다, 그리고 스얀 씨는 스패인어를 공부합니다.
캬먄 씨는 우리 고등학교친구입니다. 키가 아주 큽니다. 캬먄 씨는 일본어와 심리학을 공부합니다.
감사합니다.
。尋找中@22:30
I shall make a wish on omy's 天天向上许愿树 on Deepavali =)
I'm going to devote my weekend to Nanyuan, if I can. There's 3/5 of a feature to do and 3 articles to edit. Urgh, I don't want to think about the COM203 test and Math test next Thursday and Friday respectively.
I have an idealistically practical journalistic mindset.
愛，切断了。 心，也没了。 人，也死了。
。尋找中@16:16
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
My fingers are frozen stiff cuz I am sitting right under the air-con in ACRC. I am here typing with numb fingers cuz I cannot resist the temptation to blog and share my joy...
It's over!!!
Or rather, ONE of it is over -.-
It, being presentations of the week, grouped together as the one entity which has been tormenting for the past week.
The one, being my Chinese Migration presentation. Over! However the standard... It's totally weird having to do presentations in Chinese, Korean and English, all in the same week. Oh yeah, I am so multilingual. I am so incoherent in Chinese, especially when I try to read according to my script, cuz my script was so "written" it's not meant to be spoken. Oops...
One down, two more to go - Korean+English, one after another on Friday...
COM201 mid-term quiz tmr, again... I shall be gone~
。尋找中@16:36
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Yeah! I chiong-ed out my Individual Speech 2 script yesterday! Pretty much just giving reasons to go GREEN... I finished my Chinese Migration Presentation general script too! I still have to complete the powerpoint presentation... And I have no idea how to conclude... Gosh...
Next week's E-learning week for COM201... We can have lessons from home, i.e. hostel room... Grrr... Semester ending in 3 weeks! Exams coming as soon too! *Dies* Uni time flies... =(
。尋找中@08:35
Friday, October 10, 2008
My iPod Touch is going crazy! The touch screen is working fine for non-Safari functions, but when I tried to use Safari, I can't "click" on anything, which means I cannot sign in to the network, which means I cannot do anything. Crap!
Anyway I got A for my Korean essay! Yeah~ The problem is, we have to memorize and present it next Friday, which is the same day as my COM205 Speech 2. I'll either be super crazy-high or super emo-low next week.
。尋找中@12:34
Monday, October 6, 2008
Lalalala~ My group presentation for COM205 is OVER! I was freaked out before the session, calm but freezing in cold while waiting for our turn to present, jelly-leggy when standing up there in front waiting for my turn to speak, sounding loud and I'm-not-sure-how-clear-I-was but feeling totally freaked when speaking. Nevertheless, it's over!!! After all that agony. Ok, it wasn't that bad. In fact, it was really fun working with Philemon [who is freaking zai with all that tech stuff], Andrew [who is a fantastic speaker] and Xiao Xuan [who speaks really well and can enunciate properly while speaking at uber-high speed]. We are so passionate about our topic, aren't we?! Haiz too bad I let my nerves wreck my performance; actually I didn't let it, it just kicked in. Right, I should write single-sided speech cards so that I don't confuse myself. It's OVER, It's OVER, It's OVER, It's OVER~
Second individual speech coming up next Friday; Chinese migration presentation [25 min!!!] coming up next Wednesday; Korean oral presentation of written essay [min 20 sentences] next Friday too!!! GG
。尋找中@20:11
Saturday, October 4, 2008
Now I understand why 命中注定我爱你 obtained such high ratings. I've been watching random episodes on TV and every episodes just made me want to continue watching. This 偶像剧 seems to be longer than others though. Hmm shall watch the complete serials during holiday.
---
Interesting things we learn in Communication Studies...
[Source: Wikipedia]
The triangular theory of love is a theory of love developed by psychologist Robert Sternberg. The theory characterizes love within the context of interpersonal relationships by three different components:
Intimacy • Feelings of closeness, connectedness, and bondedness. Passion • Drives that lead to romance, physical attraction, and sexual consummation. Commitment • In the short term, the decision to remain with another; in the long term, the shared achievements and plans made with that other.
The “amount” of love one experiences depends on the absolute strength of these three components; the “type” of love one experiences depends on their strengths relative to each other. Different stages and types of love can be explained as different combinations of these three elements; for example, the relative emphasis of each component changes over time as an adult romantic relationship develops. A relationship based on a single element is less likely to survive than one based on two or all three.
What kind of love do you have for HIM/HER?
当我们存在不同的地面上...
---
Wow...
Seow Kia Hui is getting used to [almost] dozing off in Math lecture and drifting far far far away. I still love Math [I just cannot stand the teaching].
But she's actually participating in class discussion online [or rather, she's forcing herself to think; nothing much is coming out anyway]. However, the lecturer's habit of displaying the headshot of the person he quotes from the discussion board is a great deterrence. It's fun, however, to post up own opinions and see others' responses, be it agreement or disagreement. I should try to participate more.
This week is totally dominated by two things - COM205 group presentation and Nanyuan production. It's a good thing COM205 group presentation will be done after this coming Monday, after which I will have another two presentations to prepare for my COM205 individual speech 2 and Chinese Migration. Hope I can keep up or improve my momentum.
Tedious and exasperating as it may be, it is really quite interesting. I just need to be more flexible. I'm about as flexible as a diamond pole now - not. Jiayou jiayou XD
。尋找中@09:21
Friday, October 3, 2008
There are still times when my journalistic characteristic kicks in...
By the way, I was wondering, if someone enters S/P/H C/N/D through application, is there a choice of where to go, or will you still be subjected to management allocation decision? Not that it's any business of mine, since I know I will be subjected to the forces, but not that I mind. I'm going to make sure I get a try at every paper. I want to go omy! They seem so dynamic and cool! XD WB rox too, of cuz =P
。尋找中@22:04
Getting me totally pissed off early in the morning on my longest day is bad, very bad. I have a big issue with personal space. There's a reason why I always take the aisle seat on the bus. Maybe I'm claustrophobic. I'll only shift in cuz the bus is too crowded and I feel bad blocking the seat. *pissed*
。尋找中@08:28
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Whoosh~ Finally done with my COM203 reflective essay, I hope. Edited it twice today, shall refrain from touching it again. [Won't have time for that anyway.] More satisfied with how it looks now than how it did. *Smiles*
。尋找中@01:13
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
Hmm... Why am I so naive and take everything as it is without giving much thought? I am seriously lacking in critical thinking skills and sensitivity!!
First of all, Selamat Hari Raya Puasa and Happy Children's Day XD
We were supposed to meet at Canteen B for lunch before our meeting for COM205 group presentation. I reached 15 min early and went to the upper deck to wait for the others. Then I received a message from Philemon that most canteens were not open today. I walked over to the edge of the upper deck and glanced down; what the hell, empty. The first thought which came to mind was: Never mind, there's still the sandwich machine. I went over to the one outside Canteen B, and realized that the machine is not in operation today. Nice. Thank goodness the snack machine was working perfectly fine, and that's where I got my lunch - two packets of biscuits. We were kidding that we fast ON hari raya puasa. Why like that...
Meeting was quite successful. We managed to tweak the angle and all, and the idea looks quite presentable now. Now I'll have to get my script and outline as well as powerpoint out by Friday. Good luck to me! At least my group is quite fun to work with. =D We are so excited about our presentation topic! R&R all the way!
My mother and auntie came to visit after my meeting. Gosh. Eeks. Don't get me wrong, my mother's most definitely welcomed. Never mind, they brought me KFC for dinner. Nice, but not so good cuz they are still used to feeding me like a pig. Had to convince them to bring what's left back home for my brother. They wanted to leave it for me for supper.
OMG, my auntie and my mother are of no doubt sisters. On her first visit to my hostel, my mother nearly washed her hand at the hot water dispenser. She was alert enough to draw away when one drop of steaming hot water touched her hand. My auntie basically did wash her hand with the same hot water and came back with a sore hand. Didn't have any ice available, so had to do fluid icing at the water cooler. Alamak, red label means hot/dangerous/stay away! Remember that.
